A Story About Weight Loss

“I can’t lose weight.”

This was the story that I told myself. And to me, at the time, it wasn’t just a story. It was reality.

I’d tried countless diets—I could name a dozen, at least. I’d tried weight loss pills, an insane amount of exercise, fasting, and just about anything else I could think of.

Yet, when I reviewed my weights that I logged into My Fitness Pal, it was still about the same as it was a year ago. The same as six months and three months ago, too.

Seeing that little graph—basically a straight line—on this app was one of the most soul-sucking moments of my life. How could I have been doing all this work, for ALL of this time, and still weigh the same? I’d missed so many Christmas dinners, vacations, happy hours, and for what? To weigh the exact same as I did before?

All of a sudden, memories started flashing through my mind.

I remembered the day when I went back to Michigan to visit family. We all met at a park so that I could see everyone. It was the first time I’d seen my goddaughter in a long time, and she was bursting with excitement to see me. She ran up and gave me a big hug!

“I made something!” she said.

“Oh yeah,” I said, as a big smile crossed my face. “What did you make me?”

She reached into her little pink backpack and pulled out a cookie wrapped in plastic. The cookie was shaped like a heart, with frosting and a design.

“I made it just for you!” she said, with a big smile.

My stomach cringed when she handed it to me. I knew that I couldn’t eat it. If I did, it would destroy all my progress. I told her I would eat it later, and I tucked it away in my purse.

I never ate the cookie. And my goddaughter never got the satisfaction of watching me take a bite.

Another memory. My husband and I once had an anniversary. We skipped a night out and instead cooked some lame diet food at home, just like any other night.

These memories flashed through my head over and over, until eventually I came to a sad, defeating conclusion.

I can’t lose weight.

This was my story for a long time. I used this story as an excuse to binge. To feel sorry for myself. To fall into little mini depressions. To not move my body. To go for Hot Fudge Sundaes at McDonald’s at 2AM (always with extra nuts).

I was just so burnt out from the crash diets. And what did it matter anyway? I knew I would just gain the weight back.

And then I had a moment of truth. I was at a conference in Florida. I was looking to grow my career. The presenter asked us a question.

“What is your limiting belief?”

I wrote down something surfacy.

“That I can only make X amount of money.”

For some reason, though, the page kept staring at me. You’re lying, a voice inside me whispered.

I looked down at the paper again. I erased what I had written about making more money, and I wrote something entirely different. Tears filled my eyes.

“I can’t lose weight,” was what I wrote.

So, why am I telling you this story? This was a pivotal moment in my life that sprouted a seed of self-awareness that completely changed EVERYTHING for me.

And maybe you, reading this right now, can have a pivotal moment, too. It’s easy to believe something when it’s all we’ve seen. For instance, when you look up at the sky, it’s blue, right? So, it’s pretty safe to say that you BELIEVE that the sky is blue. But what if I told you that the sky is green? You might not believe me at first. You might even think I’m a nut job. Why? Because you have clear evidence that the sky is blue. But what if I told you that I live in Alaska, and when I look up at the sky I see the Northern Lights? In my world, the sky is green. In your world, the sky is blue.

The point I am trying to make is this: I believed that I couldn’t lose weight because I thought I had evidence to support it. I literally had a GRAPH with DATA showing that no matter how many times I dieted, over the years, I still averaged out to the same weight.

At least, that’s what I told myself. I believed I couldn’t lose weight because I wanted to believe I couldn’t lose weight. I needed to broaden my perspective.

Do you think there’s other people just like me that have lost their weight for good? That have great bodies? That enjoy their lives and feel confident in their skin?

Well, yeah, of course there are!

One of my favorite phrases that I used to say is, “I’ve tried everything!” And, at the time, that story felt real to me. After all, I’d tried tons of diets and methods. But, when I broadened my perspective, and looked at scope of the ENTIRE world, had I really tried everything? Not even close. I bet I didn’t even try 100 things. And there are THOUSANDS!

So, a lot of times we get caught in our stories. We get caught in our self-limiting beliefs. Sometimes, these beliefs can even feel rewarding. (That’s called secondary gain, but that topic is for another time.)

What I realized is that there was absolutely nothing to gain by telling myself that I can’t lose weight. So, I came up with a different story. I told myself that I CAN lose weight. And I became unstoppable.

That same year, I got into the best shape of my life and completely changed my relationship with food. I never looked back.

Take it from a girl who felt she had had no way out.

If you want to change your body and change your life—if you want an unbelievable amount of confidence—if you want to be able to enjoy food and your life and still feel amazing in your skin—start by changing what you believe.

Love, Julia